Monday, March 30, 2009

I'm not an Enabler!

By Cindy McTavish

My therapist tells me I am the enabler in the family and enable my husband to be an alcoholic and drug addict. She’s nuts. I lay the law down and get things my way. Why would I enable my husband to be an alcoholic? Is it the fact that he cheated on me 6 times? Is it the $4,000,000,000 life insurance policy he has? The prenup? Absolutely not. I love him. Wholly.

I went to my therapist to better myself, but then it got to be all about Todd. I had to mention he was an alcoholic and drug addict, right? She thinks because he has a long history of crushing up pills that it may have not been right for me to buy him a mortar and pestal on his birthday. I thought he enjoyed cooking and would use it to mix up spices and things!! How did I expect he would take it and mash up a bunch of OxyContin with it?

She also thinks that hanging neon beer signs in the bedroom isn’t too smart. What can I say? I’m old fashioned and it reminds me of my home back in New Jersey. There were bars everywhere. Oh the memories.

Just because he drinks, doesn’t mean I can’t. In fact, I think because he is the way he is I should be able to let off some steam. So, I have some drinks from time to time. And my back hurts so I just tend to leave the bottle of Goldschlager on the counter beside the fridge. It’s better than having to go in the cabinet to get it. And if I notice some missing, then it’s no big deal. It’s not that expensive.

She also says that symbols of drugs can cause him to relapse. Well, I mean, I didn’t know that putting our coffee creamer in individual baggies and tying them up real tight with a twisty tie looked like cocaine. I was trying to be nice. I even left straws beside them in case he wanted to drink his coffee without spilling it on his suit. I guess spilling the coffee wasn’t as bad as him driving to Newark to get an ounce of coke and disappearing to Atlantic City for 9 days. Because of coffee creamer! And I honestly was trying to help!!!

She also had something to say about my hobby. I took up wine collecting. I have a passion for wine. So, I renovated Todd’s gym into a wine cellar. Not all of it, he still works out there everyday, but I have about 1000 bottles of wine down there. I also decided to grow my own, so I turned our backyard into a small vineyard. Todd complains because he has to walk through the vineyard to get to his toolshed. To stop his complaining about it, I installed a fridge in is shed and a couch in case he gets tired from working out in the yard. And a TV.

And she even had the nerve to bring in my health condition into this. I received my first flu shot the other day. It was a pinnacle point in my life to better myself. So, I convinced the nurse to let me take the syringe home. I put it in a plaque and it’s displaying right there over the..

Oh, it’s gone. ..

Anyway, I don’t know what she is talking about. I am going to find a new therapist. Before I leave for my next appointment, I just have to take the brownies I made for Todd out of the oven.